“Oh Sh*t,” he said….

Last night we were met with an unfortunate incident regarding everyone’s favorite vorpal rabbit, Java Joe. While I was cleaning his cage, I noticed that he reeked of fetid ass even after the cage had been cleaned.

As he was hopping away, I noticed a gigantic black mass swinging from his belly fur. I turned him over and saw a gigantic black mass bulging from his abdomen about halfway up his stomach. I immediately thought they were his intestines, based on the way it had stuck out of his stomach skin (it had slightly folded, giving the illusion of a tear in the skin).

I grabbed one of the “to throw away” washcloths and it quickly became apparent that we were dealing with a shit demon the likes of which we had never seen before. Joe was extremely dissatisfied with the proceedings, because the aforementioned shitball had become matted and stuck to not only his stomach skin, but also his little rabbit twig and berries too.

This thing was so impacted that it took a full hour to remove, nearly causing the pukes in all members involved (Tasha had taken charge of holding Joe down while I removed the clump). We were later instructed by ‘s wife that we should get him some fresh cut pineapple juice in case he’s got a hairball (which rabbits can’t regurgitate, so it just binds them up).

We are pleased to report that Joe’s bowels have apparently returned to normal, as there was standard fare raisinettes in the cage this morning. We will be checking him closely from here on out so that we do not have a repeat performance, because that was quite possibly the most disgusting thing I’ve done in awhile.