I’ve been spending a lot of time lately reflecting about the various priorities that life brings.  I don’t really have any epiphanies to report, but nonetheless I think it is wise to get my thoughts out onto digital paper so they stop rattling around in my head so much.

God and Family

For the first time in my entire adult life, I am putting God first.  I have done more in the last 18 months to reintroduce myself to the Catholic faith than ever, and it feels GREAT.  The catalyst for this change should be obvious to anyone that has looked at my Facebook feed in the last year: it was the birth of my daughter, Eve.  I realized that if I was going to baptize and raise her as a Catholic, I should better know the proper things that I ought to be teaching her and be sure that I could answer questions from her as they arise (in the future, obviously).  That led me to the That Man Is You! men’s fellowship, then to the Knights of Columbus, and then to my own personal studies in Catholic apologetics.  I embarked upon all of the proceeding activities with three main goals: become a better man, be a better father for Eve, and be a better husband for Tasha.

Skeptical?  Good, so was I… when I went into the That Man Is You! introductory classes, I decided to go in with an open mind and left any baggage (and there was a LOT) at the door and actually strive to learn what the Catholic Church actually teaches instead of what I heard translated through people wronged in some way by the Church, by media, or by hearsay.  I was pleased to find that the more I dug, the more I felt uplifted and empowered.  I could go on and on with details (and I may someday) but I think a single quote by Archbishop Fulton Sheen about sums it up: “There are not more than 100 people in the world who truly hate the Catholic Church, but there are millions who hate what they perceive to be the Catholic Church.”  The more I read the actual teachings of Christ and the Magisterium, the more the false perception drops away.

That was a long windy paragraph, but I can continue on now… it won’t surprise you to know that necessarily my second main priority has been my family.  I help put Eve to bed most every night, we have playtime together when I’m home from work, or at a minimum I help feed her dinner.  Tasha and I are trying to get a little “no computer” time each night so we stay connected at a level that doesn’t involve picking up toys.  She also participates in the Ladies Auxiliary, which operates alongside the Knights of Columbus (so we do Church activities together).  We’re applying the above lessons from the Church directly to our family, and our family is getting better all the way to it’s core.

Work / Life Balance

This topic has often been used in a sarcastic tone in my immediate past, but the priorities toward God and family have put work in it’s rightful place.  I still have to aggressively participate in my job when I’m at the office, but I take time in the morning to see Eve before I go, and so long as the sky isn’t falling I leave at a generally reasonable hour.  It takes some effort, and occasionally things shift around so long nights are necessary but they are the exception now.  There is some extracurricular work research that doesn’t get done now, but I’m finding ways to fit that in to my work day in creative ways.  Another important addition is that I’m taking certain status meetings on the road, and I mean that literally: some of my coworkers and I discuss work status and actually take a walk along a running trail that goes around our office instead of sitting in the cube farm all day.  It’s still important work, but it’s relaxing too.

The time I’m not spending on the above activities has been divided among my other interests.  Karate isn’t getting the focus that it used to, and I am somewhat conflicted about that.  I do my best to attend class (and I really need to Facebook/blog when I do make it) but it hasn’t been aligning with my schedule in the best ways right now.  I need to work on that.  I know some of my karate compatriots back home are reading this and worrying to themselves (and possibly others) that I’m quitting or dropping out, and that’s just not the case.  I still attend class, and I enjoy it when I do.  The burner’s still on, but it’s set to LOW for a bit while I work on some other things.  Eventually, I’ll put some tape on it and get over it.

My other hobbies, such as reading and guitar playing/building do occupy some time, but it’s usually evenings or the spare weekend day.  I am going to make some weekend time for getting started on my guitarbuilding hobby, so expect to see some entertaining posts in the Recreation category.

So what’s the point?

None, really.  The reason I committed all this to the blog is to acknowledge efforts toward closing some deficiencies and to reflect on the positive changes this has made on my life.  These changes have been working for me right now, and I intend to continue with them.

As some of you may know, I am participating in the That Man Is You! men’s fellowship at Church.  This is the season of Lent, and the program challenges us to attempt a different covenant each week.  This week, we are challenged with something that will be very difficult: no media.

The idea is simple: the world is noisy and attention grabbing, and forces us to not spend our attention on the things that really matter.  So this week Tasha and I are going to spend our time reading more, praying more, reflecting more, and spending more time with family and friends.  I am going to completely remove TV and limit myself to only an hour of Internet time each day (outside of work, obviously).  Interestingly, one of our local grade schools is doing Screen Free Week this week so our neighborhood will be experiencing a general trend of less TV and Internet use.

So don’t be alarmed if you don’t see me online.  If something is important, please call my phone or text me.

First, an update to the money goal:

Goal 1: Save 3-6 months in an emergency fund.

Task 2: Get taxes prepared (hope for a refund!) and save $500 more this month.

Success on both parts of this goal.  We were able to save $500 since I set this task up, and today we got our tax return prepared.  Thanks to an increase in charitable donations and the arrival of Eve, we got a pretty fat return this year.  This brings us much closer to our overall emergency fund.  Once the direct transfer hits, we’ll have to do some math and see what the next task will be.  In the meantime:

Task 3: While waiting for the tax return to hit, budget aggressively and put a set amount in the emergency fund each month.

Onward to the Reading goal!

Goal 3: Read more books, targeting 10 non-fiction books for the year.

Tonight I finished a book by Joan Carroll Cruz called “Eucharistic Miracles“.  Like the title indicates, this is a collection of history surrounding the many miracles attributed to the holy Eucharist.  This book was pretty dense, since most of the chapters were only a few pages long and each story was unique and interesting.  I found out about this book from a guy in my That Man Is You! group, who was reading it himself.  I would strongly recommend this to any of my Catholic friends and family.  If you’re interested to find out more about the book let me know.  I got a lot out of reading it, and it compelled me to volunteer to help with the Eucharistic Ministry at my Church.

I’m only going to give myself half credit for this book since I technically started it last year.

Total Books Read in 2012: 1 / 10

Since this wasn’t one of my scheduled non-fiction reads this year, I’ll just keep with the same goal that I made last time:

Task 3: Finish reading Ervin Somogyi’s ‘The Responsive Guitar’ for half-credit.

That’s all for now!

I am about to cover a topic that I don’t often write about, speak about, or share with others: my Catholic Faith.  If you are not interested in such things or don’t have anything constructive to add, you might want to just pass this blog post by and wait for my next update.  Consider yourself warned.

Since we moved to Colorado, Tasha and I spent nearly two and a half years looking for a Church that could replace St. Joseph’s Catholic Church in Pekin as our parish home.  Neither Tasha or I were particularly observant up to this point, however we tried a few of the Catholic Churches in the area and none of them felt right until we found St. Mark Catholic Church.  I found it rejuvenating to go back to Mass, have Reconciliation (particular thanks to Father Jim at St. Joseph’s for giving us a head start on that topic), and in general just get comfortable participating in the faith again.

When we found out we were having Eve, it became more viscerally important to both Tasha and I to become comfortable with the Church’s teachings because we were going to have a child to worry about.  This urged us further into our analysis and participation in Church practices and activities (mainly, we began giving more) and looking for different ways to learn more.

I have never been what you would consider an “active person” in my Church… I would go to Mass and that was about it (and for quite a long while, not even that.)  Last year I told myself to just go, listen, and not think about things too hard and you’ll find out the right thing to do.  For me, the right thing to do took the shape of a program called “That Man Is You!” – a 26 week long men’s fellowship designed to strengthen Catholic men in their exploration of the Church’s teachings on how to become a better leader, father, and husband.  A man named Tom provided a short talk about the program at Church one day, and I just got the feeling that it was the right thing for me to look into.  He was looking for volunteers to help plan the program, so I volunteered.  It turns out that it has been primarily him and I organizing things, with the help of a few others, so we had a lot to do.

One Sunday last month, I was helping to promote the program by handing out flyers at the Church.  Since I had to arrive early and stay late to help answer questions, I had about an hour between Masses.  Most of the time I would get some food from the nearby Sonic and then head back to the Church.  I spent the spare minutes milling around the lobby, waiting for people to arrive and reading some of the flyers they have freely available.  One of the flyers had a portrait of a young priest and it was entitled “The Life and Legacy of Father Michael J. McGivney“.  The contents outlined the short life of Father McGivney and told of the reasons that he founded the Knights of Columbus.

The Knights of Columbus… I remembered those guys from St. Joseph’s Church in Pekin.  All I could recall was that our local DARE officer was a knight and they would sometimes come to Church in their regalia.  I don’t even remember WHY they would come to Church, but that was the memory that came back to me.  I didn’t think too much of it beyond that, then I put the flyer back in it’s place.

Fast forward a few more weeks.  I was back at the Church to help sign people up for our “That Man Is You!” program.  Once again, I was at Church early waiting for people to arrive.  Across the foyer, a man showed up wearing a Knights of Columbus vest.  He told me he was there to help set up the gifts and greet people.  Since there wasn’t anyone arriving at the Church yet, we introduced ourselves.  His vest was full of pins and badges, however the one that caught my eye was a big green button that said “Ask me about K of C!”

So I did.

He explained the intent of the organization, how they were firmly rooted in Catholic teachings and care first and foremost about families.  They do charity and social events, including the fish fry’s and pancake breakfasts that I vaguely remember mentions of from my youth.  I asked about time commitments, and he said that the only thing required to stay an active member was to attend monthly meetings and you could be involved in as much or as little charity work as you desire.  That sounded good to me, so he left me with a bunch of information.

After discussing it with Tasha and reading all I could about their organization, I have decided to join their ranks.  Last Wednesday, I was initiated and took my First Degree.  On Saturday, I take my Second and Third Degrees and become a full member.  I have already attended a meeting and gotten to know several of the men in our Council and their families, and I am excited at the prospect of learning and doing more.  The big thing I am looking forward to participating in is their charitable programs.  It feels good to help others, and this gives me a structure and some motivation to get off my butt and do more good for people, and the world needs more of that.

Now, I fully expect that many of my friends (and even my family) won’t really understand this.  In short, my response to questions / ridicule / skepticism is this: participating in this way is really working for me right now.  It makes me feel like a better person, like I am making a difference and helping people out while strengthening my relationship with Tasha and our family.  Yes, I can do that in a myriad of other ways, but this is the means I am choosing for now.  Much of my motivation is coming from Eve… I don’t want her to grow up and only see Daddy sitting on his butt in front of the computer, video game, or TV.  I would much prefer her learn how to help people and how to do good by my example.

Oh, and the other common question: no, I won’t be dressing up in the regalia.  I have to be a member for at least a year before I can take the Fourth Degree.  All in good time.